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Tuesday 30s Truth: The Hardest Part of Leadership Is Letting Them Fail in Front of You.

The leadership move almost no one talks about—and why the strongest leaders say less, not more.

Author

Glenda Carnate
November 04, 2025

Read time: 2.5 minutes

Almost every difficult decision leaders make often takes place in silence. The real wisdom is knowing when to back off, even when your instincts tell you to intervene.

Imagine yourself at a conference table with your team, presenting a solution you know is flawed. You want to jump in and make things right because you're tense. You feel like intervening will save time and shield them from errors. However, you know in your heart that if you constantly intervene, they won't learn to do the same. So you maintain silence. They falter and hesitate, but you watch them bounce back, regroup, and perform better than you anticipated.

You see a glimmer of pride in their eyes after the meeting... not because you intervened, but rather because they solved the problem on their own. When you decided to remain silent, you realized that true leadership had occurred.

Research by McKinsey & Company reveals that teams with high levels of trust, strong communication, clarity of purpose, and the right context are almost 2-5 times as likely to be more efficient. (McKinsey & Company, 2024)
Put simply, holding back from rescuing your team helps them build lasting skills instead of just solving problems for now.

5 Leadership Moves That Build Ownership This Week:

  • Ask before advising: instead of offering a solution, ask “What options have you considered?”

  • Delay immediate feedback: let them attempt first, then refine, instead of replacing their thinking.

  • Define outcome, not process: clarify what success looks like, not how to get there.

  • Let small failures happen: protect big risks; allow controlled falls that teach ownership.

  • Celebrate initiative over perfection: praise the courage to try before the correctness of the result.

💡Key Takeaway: 

True leadership means holding back, not always stepping in to help. It’s easy to think control shows skill, but real growth comes from letting others take ownership. Sometimes, staying quiet is the best support you can give.

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