Level: Unlocked—Parenting an Autistic Tween Without Losing Your Mind!

Dive into the hilarious, raw reality of parenting an autistic tween—where toaster battles, croc-hand fashion, and unexpected chaos create an unfiltered roadmap of neurodivergent family life.

Author

Glenda Carnate
May 26, 2025

Read time: 2.5 minutes

The toast betrayed me. The coffee's cold.

And just like that, another morning in the Multiverse of Madness begins.

Kai, my pint-sized, chaos-wielding, autistic tween, has declared our toaster a Level 10 Threat. He's wearing Crocs on his hands (because why not?), stacking cereal like a Tetris grandmaster, and suddenly—BAM—the toaster goes full Godzilla.

"VELOCIRAPTOR IN TOASTER ZONE!" he yells as if this is a perfectly normal warning. Then, in true anime protagonist fashion, he Naruto-runs out the door, leaving me clutching my "Wakanda Forever" mug, questioning every life choice that led me here.

Somewhere in the distance, I swear I hear the Minions laughing at me.

The Fact Check (Because Yes, This Really Happens)

  • Autistic sensory triggers? Real. Toaster sounds, unexpected textures, and even the wrong kind of crunch can flip the script.

  • Imaginative play as communication? Absolutely. For many neurodivergent kids, metaphors like "Velociraptor in toaster zone" make perfect sense.

  • Parents as background characters in their kid's anime? 100%. Some days, you're not the hero... you're the NPC holding the coffee.

My Survival Strategies:

✔️ "Toaster alarms" = 10-min warning (visual timers save lives)

✔️ Breakfast buffet station (autonomy = fewer kitchen battles)

✔️ Lean into the lore ("Should we feed the toaster-raptor pop tarts?")

Why You Should Care (And Subscribe Right Now)?

If you've ever:

  • Sipped cold coffee while your kid reenacted a Jurassic Park scene,

  • Been schooled in advanced chaos theory by a 10-year-old,

  • Felt like a side character in someone else's epic adventure…then you need this newsletter.

I break down the wild, wonderful, and what-the-heck-just-happened moments of parenting neurodivergent kids with humor, heart, and zero judgment.

DO THIS NOW:

  1. SUBSCRIBE (because tomorrow's battle might involve a waffle iron).

  1. FOLLOW Glenda Carnate for daily "Wait, did that just happen?" content.

  1. COMMENT below with your own "Toaster vs. Kid" war stories.

  2. SHARE this with anyone who's ever survived a morning like this.

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